Chapter Fourteen: Broken Sword or Broken Heart

We went to Ayla's hut and she was snoring rather loudly. We woke Ayla up and she wiped the sleep out of her eyes. "Sorry to wake you," said Lucca, "but we've been robbed!"

"Wh, what," said Ayla. "Must be Reptites. Crono come with Ayla! We settle with Reptites."

Well, I guess we could do that. Kino should have delivered it to the Reptites for me by now and with any luck they've killed the little bastard. All you have to do is spit some soup in a guy's face and drop your "precious" item as you turn to walk away and he can be manipulated quite easily. Let's just hope it works out as perfectly as I see it happening in my head.

I got rid of Lucca and put Ayla in my group. Lucca just disappeared into thin air. Even with the beautiful Ayla to play with, I couldn't help but be reminded of this damn curse I have. At least the choice of which two people to be stuck with was improving.

We went south to the forest to follow the footprints and when we got there Kino was taking a piss off to the side. DAMNIT! I was hoping he was dead. Perhaps he was a little smarter than I thought. Ayla started screaming at him to tell her what he did. It was obvious who wore the pants in their relationship.

"Kino take Crono stuff," said Kino. I tried to act surprised. "Kino like Ayla best," he said. "Ayla like Crono, but Kino not like..." What the hell did I do?

Oh yeah, the thing with spitting in his face.

Ayla punched Kino in the face which I found highly gratifying. "Ayla, mellow out," said Marle. I walked over to Kino and punched him in the face, too. "Kino, you know why I punish," said Ayla.

"Ayla no like Kino," said Kino. "NO," said Ayla. "Ayla like Kino BEST! No more do bad stuff, okay?! That wrong!" Crap. She still likes Kino best. Oh well. The day will come when Kino will no longer stand in my way. Oh, if only Ayla would punch me in the face and dominate me.

Kino apologized and said that the Reptites took our stuff. Ayla decided to follow the tracks in hopes that we could get the timekey back. She told Kino to go back to the village and protect it. I tripped Kino as he walked past and then I walked over next to Ayla in a moderate amount of triumph.

The battles in the forest were mostly easy and we kept following the footprints left by the Reptites. I got injured by one of the monsters, but Ayla just walked over and gave me a kiss. I was about to dive on top of her and leave the battle to Marle when I realized that my injury had healed. Well, perhaps she didn't mean anything by it, but I'll be damned if I don't find myself incompetent in battle from now on.

Whenever I was close enough to kill a monster I found myself missing, so that I would get injured. After Ayla had kissed me a half dozen times, Marle jumped in before Ayla could and she fixed my wounds. As soon as the battle was over I would drop Marle and bring Lucca back............no, wait. If I did that Lucca would try to hog all of Ayla's kisses. I guess Robo would have to be the answer. I just hope Ayla can handle a talking rock.

When the battle was over I snapped my fingers and Marle was gone. Robo appeared and although Ayla had never been introduced to him, she didn't even seem to notice. Oh well. I pulled Robo aside and explained my intentions in battle. He understood and told me that he would only heal me in an emergency. That's what friends are for. Robo knows how to follow orders.

We came out of the forest and went into the Reptite Lair. It wasn't really a lair as it had no passageways, stairs or anything. There were just some holes to jump into. How could anyone live here?

Eventually, after a few battles and several kisses we came to a Reptite who was all pimped out in a robe and shoulder pads. I had a feeling this was their leader. Wait a second. Didn't Ayla say something about Crono coming and then settling with the Reptites? Is this Ayla's pimp?

"Could the apes have made something this advanced," said Azala, who was talking to himself.

"Azala," yelled Ayla.

"Ah, the apes have arrived," said Azala. "You're nothing like Ayla."

Yep. I'm what they call a boy. Stupid talking lizard. Although, he seemed awfully familiar.

"Tell me what this is," said Azala. I told him all about our time traveling adventures and how we needed the timekey to get back home, but he didn't believe me. He called in his sidekick Nizbel to kick our asses.

"Don't worry Azala," said Robo. "We can handle anything Ayla sends our way." I snickered at Robo and Ayla gave him a funny look. I'm not sure if it was because she had just realized he was there or because he got her and Azala confused. You can't really blame him though, they practically have the same name.

"Talking rock is stupid, Crono," said Ayla or Azala or whichever one she was. I wonder if there's some sort of significance to it?

Nizbel attacked us and he was little effort to deal with. I just kept striking him with lightning, while Az...er, while Ayla and Robo beat him to death with their bare hands.

"Th...the apes beat Nizbel," said Azala. Hey, you don't have to take that Robo. You're not an ape. You're a talking rock.

"Give thing back to Crono, NOW," yelled Ayla. Azala dropped the timekey and ran off while saying something about the Reptites ruling the world. Just then it dawned on me. He was talking about Magus and his gigantic frog army in the future!

Robo ran over and picked up the time key. "I do not detect any damage," he said.

"I fight anytime, Azala," said Ayla. "Ayla no lose!" Then she let out a loud burp for some odd reason.

Back at the hut, I couldn't think of a good excuse to stay in this time period now that we had the dreamstone, so we had to leave.

"You leave, Crono," said Ayla. "No fun for Ayla!"

No fun for Crono, either, (sigh).

"I'll never forget you," said Marle, who had appeared out of nowhere. I was without a doubt, cursed. I sure hope Magus can help me.

I was fighting off the tears as I left Ayla the super hottie behind. Marle was kinda cute, but paled in comparison to Ayla. Without Ayla...........(sniffle). I zapped Robo and replaced him with my manly little friend Lucca. I needed something to make me forget about Ayla. I hope one of these two idiots can do the trick. They don't even add up to half of what Ayla is.

We got back to the Mystic Mountains where the gate was at and we climbed to the top of the mountain. We looked down the cliff at where we came in from. "We all have to jump at the same time," said Lucca. "On three. One, two, three," said Lucca. Marle and Lucca both jumped off of the cliff and I just stood there watching them fall with the timekey still in my hand.

BAM!!!!!!!!! They crashed to the ground in pain.

"DAMNIT, CRONO," screamed Lucca from the bottom of the cliff.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! I feel a lot better now. Thanks a lot Lucca and Marle.

They climbed back to the top of the cliff. Lucca looked pissed off, but Marle was just giggling at me. I patted Lucca on the back and she just rolled her eyes.

"Ok, Crono," she said. "Enough screwing around. One, two, three!" I started to jump and just as I could tell that Marle and Lucca couldn't turn back I stopped, gave them both a push and watched as they fell back down to the bottom.

"DDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNIT, CCCCCROOOOOOOONOOOOOOOOO," yelled Lucca as she fell to her doom and slammed into the bottom of the cliff again. This time she was running up the mountain with her gun ready to fire. Her face was red and just as she got within firing range I zapped her away and Robo was standing there blinking at me. Marle limped to the top of the cliff and she crossed her arms and gave me a stern look.

I was feeling a lot better and I could hardly remember ol' whatsername that had broken my heart. I whispered in Marle's ear and she giggled.

"OK, Robo," said Marle. "The timegate is just over the cliff, so we all have to jump at the same time."

Marle and I tricked Robo into jumping off of the cliff 26 times. He would have gone over a 27th, but after the 26th we realized that he was laying at the bottom of the cliff and not moving. Marle healed him and he got back on his feet. "It seems that I jumped too soon once again," said Robo. We decided that he'd had enough. However, on second thought, I decided maybe one last time would be fair.

Just after he jumped, I snapped my fingers and Lucca appeared in mid-air.

"What the-" said Lucca as she fell to the ground with a slam. She was laying there in pain. "Crono! I'm going to-"

Change into Robo. We're definitely coming back here. There are so many good things to do in this time period. Like Azala. My sweet Az.......I mean Ayla.

Marle was a sweetie in spite of her cheerleaderesque existence and she definitely had a high threshold for the things I did to her. Maybe there was potential for us if I could just get past the whole thing about getting executed by her father if he ever sees me again. Of course, she's still a distant second on my list.

When we used the timegate I made sure to jump into the corresponding gate at the end of time as quickly as possible to get to Medina village where Melchior was at. Just as I suspected Lucca was standing at the gate with her gun pointed at it. She missed me, but hit Marle right in the face. She fell flat on her ass and I grabbed her by the leg to pull her in with me before Lucca could get off another shot.

I had Robo spray her with his Cure Beam once we were safely in Medina village.

"Ohhhhhh," said Marle. "Crono, you butthead! You made me fall off the cliff again." She was obviously a little delirious, so I carried her on my back to Melchior's. When we walked in, Robo placed the dreamstone on Melchior's table and I placed Marle on the floor.

"You found some dreamstone," said Melchior in surprise. "How on earth did you get the Masamune.......and the dreamstone?" Something about his tone suggested that he wasn't actually surprised, but that he was pretending to be for our benefit. I don't really care as long as he fixes it, so I can wield it. I'm gonna kick some ass with that sword.

Robo and Melchior went downstairs to fix the sword, so I stayed upstairs and made out with Marle. She was still delirious, but not so much that she didn't know what was going on. I think it helped her headache go away and since I had my eyes closed, she was Ayla. We finally went downstairs and Melchior was going on and on about what he had to do in order to fix the sword. Just shut up and fix it old man, geez.

When he was finally done, Melchior handed us the Masamune.

"Awesome," yelled Marle, "what a weapon! OK, Crono, let's take the Masamune to Frog." What? Why should we take it to Frog? I'm the Legendary Hero, not him! Where does she get crazy ideas like this? I think she fell on her head one too many times, though I'm partly to blame for that. If she keeps letting her imagination get the best of her she'll never be of any help in defeating Magus and his army of frogs.

I put the Hero Medal on and I picked up the Masamune in triumph. The sword flew out of my hands and the Hero Medal suddenly became so heavy that it slammed me to the ground.

"I don't think so," said Masa. "Take us to Frog," said Mune.

Robo carried the Masamune and the Hero Medal as we traveled back to the timegate. I was feeling a little embarrassed and I was confused about how that frog could be the Legendary Hero. It wasn't helping that Marle kept snickering at me the whole time we were walking back. If she didn't stop I was going to shove the Hero Medal up her ass.